Transformations

Stephen G. Jordan: Don't wear white shoes at an agricultural fair

Fri, 10/02/2015 - 4:15pm

    We humans are social creatures; however, it's also true that, to the bewilderment of the chronically social, some of us quite like solitude. Still, even those of us who are fine spending time with just ourselves — a faithful dog and perhaps a cat that mostly ignores us — can get the urge to be around other people. The naturally social already have this urge.

    Satisfying this itch for experiencing community can take on many forms. I have long advocated that everyone should seek out events that will expose them to people and ideas outside of those encountered in their daily routine. For example: if you don't fish or hunt, go to a sportsman's or gun show. Like dogs?... hit a dog show. Believe cars are just tools to get you from point A to point B?... go to a car show. Don't do boats?... head to a boat show. Do you have at least a passing interest in cats and are not allergic to them?... go to a cat show. I swear, a cat show. It will be one of the oddest experiences you will ever have.

    One thing that binds us all is that everyone eats. It doesn't matter if you are an omnivore, a vegan, a vegetarian, a pescetarian or an adherent to any of the myriad diets out there. You eat, and you probably don't fully understand where your food originates.

    So, how do you gain a better appreciation for the origins of what is offered in the grocery, have fun and maybe learn something? Chances are your farm experience is minimal. The next best thing is to attend a true agricultural fair.

    There are 24 agricultural fairs held in Maine each year. The largest is the Fryeburg Fair. Smaller, county-based fairs are spread about the state such that reaching one for an afternoon family trip wouldn't be a hardship.

    I love going to these types of fairs. I always have fun and learn a lot. I went to the Union Fair and Wild Blueberry Festival, the Windsor Fair and the Blue Hill Fair. There are similarities. All have midways for those that are tall enough. Each has a crafts exhibition. All three feature harness racing, animal pulling, animal exhibitions and some type of entertainment. One more thing, all have plenty of, what to many is the real reason to go to the fair — fair food.

    I asked the ticket sellers and the ticket takers at each fair the same question, "What's the best thing to eat?" The replies were identical...French fries. Fries were clearly a very popular item. I admitted defeat and stopped trying to count how many people were walking around with paper dog bowls full of fries. Besides, how do you count the children in strollers who demanded their share as long as the fry was dipped in ketchup? Pizza was obviously popular with teens and adults, especially the pies cooked in wood fired ovens. Fried dough covered in powdered sugar seemed to be a big hit with kids, as were HUGE glazed doughnuts.

    I don't feel that it is an exaggeration to observe that fair food isn't good for us. Casually observing what people were eating, it was easy to see that generally we of Maine are not a slim population. This impression is backed up by hard data.

    On Sept. 27, the Bangor Daily News published an article titled: Watch obesity overtake Maine and the rest of the country in this time-lapse map. It's a fascinating thing to watch as state-by-state the obesity percentages rise. Maine has a 26 percent obesity rate. That means if you lined up four average Mainers, slightly more than one would be obese. The popularity of fried fair food items is just one easily observed example that what we could do a better job at choosing what we eat.

    I first came to this love of “Ag” fairs years ago, when I lived in a couple of big farming states, Indiana and Ohio. They have state fairs as big as small cities. My favorite attraction at these events was tractor pulling. These tractors never worked a farm just as a dragster never goes to the grocery. My favorites were the models powered by four Rolls Royce V-12 aircraft engines, and those powered by jet engines. The noise, the flames and the constant possibility that one or more engine would explode made the events spectacular. Our fairs aren't on the tractor pulling circuit.

    Instead, I watched steer pulling and horse pulling. The animals are impressive. In a steer category that included nine entries, I noticed what may be a key to victory. The top three teams had something in common: The owners/team drivers spoke English to the steers and used their names; They did not use this long flexible leather thing each human had as a whip.; Each of the owners/team drivers hung out with their team while waiting their turn. They talked to the steers and the people who were around. I spoke with the eventual winning team. The owner/team driver seemed the most open. He explained the rules, the differences between the types of steers, plus, all the time I spoke to him, I petted the steers, scratching their faces and behind their ears. Both steers and human couldn't have been nicer. Who knew using the animal's name apparently gives it the urge to pull extra hard?

    I noticed something else at the Windsor Fair. I have no interest in fashion. My personal style illustrates that. But, if you don't want to stick out like a sore thumb, maybe you should pay some attention to what you're wearing. The weather was quite warm when I attended the fairs. Windsor is the furthest inland. I wore shorts, sandals and a Wooden Boat School ball cap. I realized while watching the pulling events that it was pretty easy to pick out the person who wasn't a farmer. I didn't see any other men wearing shorts or Wooden Boat School hats. The other gentlemen were in jeans and caps from farm equipment manufacturers and seed companies. The Union Fair did have a few men in shorts. Their ball caps, however, were the same as the Windsor participants. Blue Hill Fair was a different story. The participants were in the standard jeans and Ag ball cap; however, many attendees were in shorts, Wooden Boat School caps and yacht club polo shirts. It is also the fair closest to the coast. Coincidence? I doubt it.

    The Blue Hill Fair offered some other information a fair goer should keep in mind. Don't wear a completely white ensemble. It won't stay that way for very long. You really can't go within the barns and around the exhibit pens of cows, horses, goats, pigs, chickens, geese, rabbits and guinea hens without stepping in some kind of animal waste. You can make a game out of figuring out what animal waste is on your shoe when you get back to your car. I think I had horse, cow, and maybe goat.


    Stephen G. JordanStephen G. Jordan is a Maine native. He has practiced and taught law in different states and at different universities. He followed a similar path in the fields of geology, engineering geology and remote sensing. These days he can be found in Rockland living a happy life with his flat coated retriever, Luna. He hopes to someday figure out what he wants to do when he grows up. 

     


    Transformations
    We tell stories.
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    Transformations is a weekly story-telling column. The stories are written by community members who are my students. Our stories are about family, love, loss and good times. We hope to make you laugh and cry. Maybe we will convince you to tell your stories.
    — Kathrin Seitz, editor, and Cheryl Durbas, co-editor

    "Everyone, when they get quiet, when they become desperately honest with themselves, is capable of uttering profound truths. We all derive from the same source. There is no mystery about the origin of things. We are all part of creation, all kings, all poets, all musicians; we have only to open up, only to discover what is already there." — Henry Miller

    Kathrin Seitz teaches Method Writing in Rockport, New York City and Florida. She can be reached at kathrin@kathrinseitz.com. Cheryl Durbas is a freelance personal assistant in the Midcoast area. She can be reached at cheryldurbas@tidewater.net.